I can see tomorrow already

The fact of the matter is, being a medium has its drawbacks at times. I get an enormous sense of relief when I pass on messages for loved ones who really need them; the pain comes when that message is for me. This morning when I woke suddenly to be told that something had happened, I asked, as I always do 'what is it?'. I wrote down what was said and closed my eyes again, knowing that when it was revealed to me, it would feel different. Two hours later, when the message was confirmed, I sat and questioned myself. Why does this happen to me? Why do I know what's going on without having to be told? It's like the life I'm in I've lived a thousand times. It's very painful to accept a truth that came to you from spirit, before it presented itself in real life; it's like an intrusion of privacy. The worst moments are when the living messenger won't allow the truth to be heard and you shoulder the burden of feeling like you got it wrong. Tonight, when I gave a reading about someone's child, I felt better. The other week when I passed on words from a woman killed by cancer, I felt valuable. In general though, having the 'gift' is quite traumatic. At the moment this is amplified by the people that pass through my house daily, telling me things I don't want to know. The absolute worst thing is when someone tells you that something is not going to work out, yet you had always believed it would. Sometimes the world comes crashing down. If I had made mistakes in readings I would shrug it off, but so far I just haven't. So I have to listen to what I'm told. It's a very good job I needn't speak of it!